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"Lou is not talking about mechanics when he goes out to the mound,"
~Chicago Cubs pitching coach Larry Rothschild

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Hell Just Froze Over

I really didn't think I was going to care about the WBC, but I've watched all four games over the last two days. The Cuba/Panama game was as good as you'll find, the Dominicans can simply crush the hell out of a baseball, and the Chinese can't do anything well.

With all that said, I was obviously most interested in watching the US team play. It's tough for me to root for Jeter in any situation, but I try my best when he's at the plate. But to this point, Jeter and the rest of the squad have been nothing less than embarrassing. Sure, I know they won the first one against Mexico, but 2-0 is hardly something to brag about. It's like beating up a girl or video taping yourself having sex with you sister.

Then we take on Canada today. The country who's biggest attribute is being able to compare itself to an outdoor patio over the neighborhood's biggest party. I glanced over the Canadian roster and decided that as long as Jason Bay didn't go 6-6 with 6 homeruns and pitch 5 innings of shutout ball, we shouldn't have much of a problem.

Of course, that was assuming that a bunch of MLB All-Stars could hit a Single A pitcher. It also assumed that last year's Cy Young runner-up could get out the likes of Pete Orr, Stubby Clapp, Aaron Stern, and a few other guys with French sounding names. I know you should never assume anything, but I felt pretty safe on this one. Now I've got to move to Canada. Not because I'm embarrassed, but because I actually made a bet with my roommate that if we lost I'd move to Canada.

Is it true that weed is legal in Vancouver? How's the weather in Montreal this time of year? The Twins play in Toronto a couple times a year. Maybe I'll go there. Thanks a lot US team. You've forced me out of the country. What do you think about that, eh?

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